The Land and Life of Endless Light

So, as I was cooking lunch this afternoon, I realized that my grumpy attitude and frustrated thoughts probably had a root in not reading my bible this morning and praising Jesus for his awesomeness. I decided instead of watching something crappy on TV I would do my devo at lunch. And man, I'm glad I did. I decided to just start reading 1 Corinthians, it's a great book and a lot more fulfilling than my lunch was...

Brothers, think of what you were when you were called. Not many of you were wise by human standards; not many were influential; not many were of noble birth. But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise; God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong. He chose the lowly things of this world and the despised things-and the things that are not-to nullify the things that are, so that no one may boast before him. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God-that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. Therefore, as it is written: "Let him who boasts boast in the Lord."

I got to this and immediately pulled out my pen to mark it. It's funny how God can answer prayers as fast as a blink of an eye or take years to answer it. When I was thanking Him for my food, I also asked that He would show up today in my life. I know it probably sounds a bit selfish, but that's what I prayed for. And I'm so glad He did.

Those verses (1 Cor 1:26-31) blew my mind. I know I've read them before but it's funny how some things don't ever mean anything and then all of a sudden, BOOM! we understand it, and it's impactful.

This past season of my life I've been struggling a lot with living my own life, as just me, JB and no Jesus to direct my life. The work positions that I've had have been great opportunities to submit to Jesus, but I've been having a really hard time doing that. I've had this opinion of myself that since I'm in charge of others I don't need to have anyone in charge of me.

I've been boasting in myself.

I've been upset with myself a lot, on edge with others because I've been judging myself by my standards, wanting to keep myself on a pedestal for all to see (metaphorically speaking) and not taking on the position that my Savior gave me. The one who literally had everything before Him, got on his knees to clean the dirt and poop and trash off His creation's feet. He was being tortured and killed by His creation, when He could have gone Super Saiyan on them (Yeah, I just related Jesus and Dragon Ball Z ;)

I can't fully wrap my mind around the fact that the Creator of everything became a human and died for us. I mean, I can say that and from a literal standpoint it's easy to understand, but to go deeper and think about who that Creator is and what He has, is and will continue to do is unthinkable.

I guess I wanted to write this blog because I've been struggling with boasting only in Christ Jesus. It's not a fun thing to admit that I've been putting myself before my Lord, but I thank the Holy Spirit so much for bringing to light what has been hidden in darkness in my heart these past few months. I hope if you read this that you can keep me accountable with boasting only in Christ and the things that He's done and is doing and will continue to do. And I pray that you can be encouraged that if you're feeling down, like you're worthless, foolish, lowly or whatever that God has made you mighty in that, in these weak positions we cannot boast of ourselves but only in Him who made us righteous.